This March brings us a full super moon, arriving at 9:43pm ET on the 20th, approximately four hours after the Equinox (5:59pm). With the moon in Libra and the sun in Aries, this potent combination provides illumination on the balance of our relationships. The energy of the Equinox enhances the awareness of patterns and programming that no longer serve our highest selves, revealing new perspectives that support our personal and collective evolution and expansion.
Relationships provide us with ample circumstance to become aware of where our beliefs and patterns are holding us back. Relationships are great teachers, if we are able to step back and understand them in that context. Relationships can show us where we are longing for reconciliation within ourselves. And the truth is, until we have reconciled those parts of ourselves, the division that we are experiencing externally will likely continue to present itself.
Relationships are a balance between independence and togetherness. And they are often governed by our stories of what relationship could/should/would be. It is common to find oneself investing more energy in what you think the relationship should be like than accepting the present moment of the relationship for what it is. This is a time to tune into the stories that you have about what a balanced relationship looks like for you.
Imbalance can occur as co-dependency, the feeling that you are responsible for how the other person feels, or vice versa, resulting in a pattern of enabling both participants in their own stories. This limits the ability to meet one another in the best versions of who we are. And this dynamic can create a pressure around the togetherness aspect of relationship. On the flipside, imbalance can occur as an aversion to intimacy – keeping the other at a “safe” distance to protect the heart.
Imagine your relationship as a wise spiritual teacher. What can you learn from your relationship? Where can you explore healthy boundaries through relationship, creating more space for the wholeness of YOU to show up? This is ultimately the path to create balance, by showing up in your whole self, whatever that looks like in the moment. This also means that balance is not at all a static target but is dependent on the degree of authenticity in your being and in your relationship.
If you are feeling so called, choose one relationship to work with for the purpose of this astrological moment and your own personal evolution. It doesn’t have to be a romantic relationship, perhaps use the relationship that first comes to mind, or one that is presenting as challenging at this time.
Now it’s time to get honest. This can be tricky due to the common disconnect between deeply held beliefs and the truth of our heart. Do your best. That’s all we can really do, commit to yourself to discern the truth as best you can. That is more than enough. Find a comfy place to be, have your journal on hand, and perhaps light a candle and set an intention for this work.
Tune into your body by taking a few deep breaths into the belly and following the flow of air on the inhale and exhale. If it feels comfortable, connect to mother earth by imagining roots growing down into the earth from your feet or from your root chakra at the base of the spine. Take a few moments in this space, using the breath to help your body relax by exhaling excess tension or busyness of the mind. Make a commitment to be gentle with yourself, this is not a place for self-judgement, it’s simply an exploration into the beliefs that no longer serve.
Ask yourself the following questions and answer in your journal:
What is your story of what a balanced relationship looks like?
Now tune into the area around the heart and direct the question there and see what comes: Is this story true? What does your heart need in relationship? What are your true needs in relationship?
List your needs and check in again around the truth of your needs in relationship. Are these needs related to a story or are they reflective of what your heart is asking for?
Tune into the relationship you have chosen to work with:
Where do you notice this relationship creating division, suffering or imbalance?
Is the imbalance related to your needs or to your story of relationship?
Where in your inner landscape is there division or suffering that you can address? Are there parts of yourself that are looking for acknowledgement and love? To be brought into your heart space with loving awareness?
What boundaries would be helpful in ensuring your true needs are met?
What would it feel like if those boundaries were in place? What is one boundary you can consider implementing now?
What patterns/stories around relationship are you ready to let go of?
What is one true need that you can commit to share within your chosen relationship?
Take a few moments to reflect on your answers. Come back to your breath and scan the body – notice if any energy has shifted in the process of recording your answers. Acknowledge yourself in a way that feels nourishing to you. Thank yourself for showing up to do the work.
When we are able to communicate our needs and use this as a starting point for creating healthy boundaries, we are creating the space that can allow us to feel freedom within ourselves, and then within relationship. Boundaries are actually a form of personal nourishment and benefit all those around you who respect your needs. May we all set the boundaries we need to find our unique paths to balance and harmony in relationship with ourselves and with those around us.
Image by @nature.poet